Divorce...

Can you believe it is the end of the semester!? This week divorce and mixed families were discussed a lot. There was a moment in my life when I was forever changed. I had a family member who was not in a healthy marriage. She tried to raise her children in the church and her husband didn't support her, he was gone a lot. They had money problems and yet he could go and do the activities that he enjoyed. This was really hard for me, in my eyes I thought she would be a lot better off without him! She could be a example and not have the negative atmosphere in the home. I took my thoughts to my grandmother. With time and multiple conversations and much prayer she helped me see that this family member had not only made a commitment to her husband and family but to God too. She was fighting as hard as she could. I thought I was so smart in thinking she should just walk away from a family unity, what I didn't know was the problems she would face as a single mom.

Just a few facts for you about divorce. 62% of Children will live with a different family unit other than the ideal mother and father model. Americans divorce more than any other people, why? We get married more than any other country for one and another reason is, one can get divorced even when one of the other spouse doesn’t want to or protests it. It only takes 10 days after you sign that you are legally divorced. You are 16 times more likely to be abused by a live-in boyfriend than a spouse. 70% of men are remarried in two years after the divorce. The kids that had parents’ divorce when they were 18 or old had the same effects or even worse. This comes in to play usually at the time of when a couple becomes empty nesters, they don't think the kids will take it as hard, but they are wrong. 

Satan knows that families are the key to our success and he is going to do all that he can to destroy them. Children that come from broken homes are much more likely to create a broken family themselves. We can be the advocate and it starts with those we are around. Our friends and family should hear us speak highly of their spouses and be able to witness us supporting their marriage.  

So many couples that end in divorce end up getting remarried or wish they had. This is so heartbreaking to me! We need to fight for marriage! We need to fight for love!

Mahrer, N. E., O'Hara, K. L., Sandler, I. N., & Wolchik, S. A. (2018). Does Shared Parenting Help or Hurt Children in High-Conflict Divorced Families?. Journal Of Divorce & Remarriage, 59(4), 324-347. doi:10.1080/10502556.2018.1454200